Thanksgiving come and gone

Mid week 7 - at the Cape with Gram.  Alice and Jane joined us on Sat for a real treat - we went to the "lobster pot tree lighting" in PTown.  It was a balmy night and festive and a lot of fun. And sure enough, a topper of buoys was dropped (via crane) onto a stack of lobster pots and the whole shebang was lit up!  Very neat to see!  Jane beat me at scrabble later that night.  I know she took it easy on me too. She didn't use any of her two letter internet scrabble words - but she beat me anyway.  Smarty pants that one.  Alice beat me earlier in the week.  I need more practice.

Lobster Pot Tree lighting - PTown

Mary, Gram, Jane and Alice - most famous photo spot in PTown (!)

Gram and I have a list of Christmas things to do and have been checking them off day by day.  We do try to make it to the beach everyday to see what's what.  Awesome.  What a beautiful place this is.

Fort Hill, Eastham, Nov 27

Mending traps - Chatham, Nov 28

Linnell Landing, Brewster Flats, Nov 29

 Plans have changed and no longer going to Zion or Bryce.  I'm sad about that.  But trip to Vegas is still ON and will finally see number one son again.  So looking forward to seeing him.  Seems the grad ceremony is at the Flamingo and is a bit fancy.  Hmmmmm..... Will be staying at the Wynn - definitely fancy :)

Keeping busy during this tough season seems to be the best approach - else what, die?  Not yet.
Pulse - making a list and checking it twice

Week 6 begins on the Cape.  Doesn't feel like 6 weeks of no work.  Not one day have I woken up and felt I should be going to work.  Not one day.  I have not dreamed about it, I have not missed it, I cannot imagine doing it again.  Interesting.  I do think about doing something else.  When I was in Maine, I saw lots if interesting jobs at the resort from full time to seasonal.  I almost applied for a few then thought - cripe! not yet.  There are a few interesting things here on the Cape too.  I have mixed feelings - pursue or chill?  For now, I'm going to chill and work on learning to sleep deeply and for more than 3 hours at a time and heal my sore heart and tired body.  And I want to make it down from those high places in my dreams without being terrified of dieing - geez. Now those are worthy pursuits. I am even able to stay up for 10pm tv shows now!  Ooolala!
Cold and cloudy today - nice weather to hunker down and work on holiday prep - cooking apps, cleaning my stove ( using Ansell gloves - finally!), finding my Xmas stuff, reviewing my gift list.  So many things I can do now without rushing or worrying or STRESSING OUT... so nice.  Gram is coming for a week or so after Tday then T and I are going to see Joe and spend some time at Zion and Bryce.  Firmed those reservations up the other day so we're good to go.
Good discussion on NPR the other day - "what would you tell your 15 year old self"?  Well:

• choose wisely
• practice good manners all the time
• learn to dance really well
• learn another language and find ways to speak it often
• work very hard
• help others - kindness matters
• do not be mean
• pray
• find the gifts
• resist thinking negative thoughts - just don't.

Had a great time at PB's party.  So nice to see good friends again.  Lots of laughs and hugs and remember whens and let's do soons.  It felt so good and safe.  Many thanks for these friends.  PB is fascinated by the birds that visit her feeder.  She especially likes the red cardinal, a real beauty.  Simple delights for a simply wonderful friend.

 Dear friends - Nov 18, 2011

 PB and "B" - happy birthday!

Looking out or looking in?

Crosby Landing, Brewster - Nov 24, 2011 - tide going out

Pulse - thankful

Around the Cape

Had a few a rainy, windy, cold days on the Cape this week.  My little condo is nice and cozy.  Finished up a few sewing gifts and took myself to lunch and a drive around.  Everything is beautiful - cranberry bogs freshly harvested, dunes wind swept and empty, light house circling and circling. The stores are starting to twinkle - getting ready for all the holiday events coming up.  I'm bringing Gram here for 2 weeks after TDay and we plan to hit all  the holiday spots.  Got our tickets to Tuscany yesterday.  Also got tickets to see Il Divo in Montreal in May.  Mother's Day gift to Gram.  She will be excited!  We'll do a long weekend.  I think about spending money when I'm not making money and that just does not seem right.  Then I think about all  the years I made money but didn't  spend money and that just does not seem right either. I have to make sure my  money makes money then spend that.  The American Way.  ha!  Headed to PB's today for our reunion.  Can't wait to see her and all the buds.  Will see the NLM on Sat then back here for a few days before TDay.  Busy is best right now.

 Harwich Bog

 Pleasant Bay - Harwich

Chatham Light

Pulse --> busy

Week 5 - On the Cape

Headed back to the Cape on Tuesday afternoon after bringing my faithful companion home to her mother.  I was sad to leave her.  I forgot how much I like dogs - such great companions, so consistently adoring and eager to please.  But also - a great responsibility.  This is a living thing that is totally relying on me to feed her and give her water and take her for safe walks.  And she is the LOUDEST sleeper - what a snore horn on that creature.  But what a great friend.  I'll dogsit whenever I can get her.  And I'm sure a dog of my own is in my future.
I wasn't sure I really wanted to come back to the Cape after such a beautiful time in Maine.  Felt a bit like a gypsy on the move again.  But I was looking forward to going to the "Grapevine" wine club meeting this week and hoping to make a friend or two there.  Once I got here - Cape Cod - OMG what a beautiful place!  Geez it's really something.  And once I got to my condo - OMG what a pretty place.  All my lovely things are hear and it smells good and it's warm and homey.  My pledge to myself is no serious decisions for at least 1 year so I will just relax and enjoy whichever beautiful place I happen to be in at the moment.
So I went to the Grapevine meeting last night all syched to meet some new people and to start digging Cape roots.  It was held at the Cultural Center in a cool, old, brick building in Yarmouth.  I was one of the first to arrive - of course - and sat at one the tables arranged in a big circle with a bar set up in the middle.  The hosts chatted with me - husband from Portugal, wife from Italy and moved to the Cape 3 years ago.  Very friendly.  Then everyone else arrived.  All came in two by two.  By two by TWO.... rats.  I didn't even think of that.  Everyone else there was a matched set.  19 of us in all.  One empty seat.  Right next to me.  I almost cried but I didn't.  I just said, "yes, I'm here alone, so how long have you lived on the Cape?"  And they were mostly retired couples - I'd guess 70s.  But whatever.  The rest of the evening was fun and I did learn some things about wine like "this wine tastes like cloves and earth" just describes the flavor which is a function of the place it was grown "terrior - earth".  The nature of the soil and the amount of sun and water, the exact circumstances of harvest day - all contribute to the flavor of the wine. Very interesting.  The monthly meetings start in January where they will explore one country's wine each month.  I'll likely go to learn and chat up a few of the oldies to learn some interesting things about the Cape and about them.  Why not.

Pulse --> busted up  

Week 5

Week 5 starts in Maine.  The first 4 have been restful - lots of fresh air, time to think, chance to finish sewing projects and actually spend some time playing on the internet.  Ha!  Also - I have learned a few things about drm.  I have learned that I am used to having "people".  I actually don't know how to do a lot of things myself.  I can run a multi million $ project but I am confused about how to fix the tv screen.  I am confused about how to load the right browser so I can upload photos.  I am confused about how to start a stupid fire.  I am worried about walking in the woods.  I am sleepless alone in a house.  I have no idea how to turn the alarms off (or on).  I don't know many how-to-take-care-of-things things.  So, I am learning.  While I sure do like to have "people", I find myself without them at this time and the show must go on - so I am learning.   And I carry a big stick in the woods to fend off bad men and beasts. Hunting season is in full swing.  Lots of both in the woods I think.
Lucy was so anxious to get outside today.  Sometimes I think I can hear her talking to me saying "When are we going out? Can we go out now? Are you almost ready to go out? About time to go out?"  She loves to go out (!).  We went to the top of our trusty dirt road - steep climb with lots of great sniffing spots and a big puddle at the top for some serious splashing around.  She seems to like to climb on rocks and look out into the wild.

 Then we headed to the river.  It was very loud and we wanted to see if the cairn that we started was still there.  We did not see or hear another human all day.  No voices.  Just lots of rushing river and lots of wind through the trees.  Actually a very windy day today but warm, and awesome.  Rushing river, howling wind and a happy dog.  It was a good day.

Pulse --> healing

Visit with Alice

Alice came to visit for a few days.  We crafted and took long walks ( daily recomended 10000 steps) and went on a picnic and ate good food and chilled.  And, most importantly, I beat her at Scrabble (only 1 time but it's a start).  The PRIZE is that for the next game, Alice will keep score. (Ha!  She hates to keep score).   She wanted to play "ZA" but couldn't use it in a sentence so NOT allowed.  We looked it up after the game and yes it is a word re:  music (or slang for pizza :) so next time we'll allow it.  We checked out the "S" swimming hole then went the other way and explored "Frenchman's hole".  Very nice visit.  Wonder dog enjoyed both directions.  She just likes to go OUT.  I'm not sleeping very well these days.  Could be the 75 lbs of dog snoring at my feet, not sure.  Have been having very wierd dreams - recurring.  I'm on a big hill (or pile or slope ) that was very difficult to climb and cannot figure out how to get down.  It takes me a long time and it's terrifying in all directions but I finally get down.  Then I wake up and am all shook up. I have this dream almost every night now. Wonder when it will not be so terrifying to get down.

Pulse -> nervous

Stormy weather

After many days of unbelievable fall weather, a storm is coming.   Brought in plenty of wood, stocked up on good food and beverages :), had the tub guy check out the tub and now watching it come through.  Also awesome weather.  Now I can spend a few days working on my quilts and and maybe cooking a new recipe.  I am trying to perfect a few home made soups - starting with a roasted tomato soup and a black bean cilantro soup.  So far, yum.  I was talking with Lucy on our walk the other day and I realized I would have missed all this beautiful weather.  It has been so perfect and soul soothing and I would have missed it all.  But this time, I did NOT miss it.  I was smack dab in the middle of it and breathing it all in.  Yahoo for sabbaticals.

Pulse --> grateful

A day to ride

Another high 60's, sunny, blue sky, warm breeze kind of day in the mountains - what a gift!  After a nice walk with the pooch and a few chores, we decided to take the bike out for a long ride to some place new for lunch.  What an awesome day to be on a harley.  We rode along the Androscogin river through Rumford and through lots of rural mountain towns.  Just beautiful. I can really feel the weather on the back of the bike - the air is warm and wonderful in the sun then dips at least 10 degrees cooler in the shadows.  The aromas are killer - earthy wood stoves, fragrant pine and leaves in the warm woods and sweet hay along the river.  Lots of fall cultivating in progress in those massive corn fields along the river - made me think "endless waves of grain" (!).  How do people live out there in those remote areas - no stores, no schools, no gas?  I always wonder, where do they work, what do they do all day, are they happy?  I imagine that they ARE happy.  Lucky. We headed for the Auburn/Lewiston Harley shop ("LA") and stopped at Gritty's in Auburn for lunch along the way.  Nice pub along another river.  Found the Harley shop and got a few things for the bike and the man.  It always feels very cool going into a Harely store.   We wanted to beat the sunset so started back right away.  Boy does it get cold fast speeding along the mountain roads on a bike on a late afternoon in November.  But boy is it beautiful speeding along the mountain roads on a bike on a late afternoon in November.  Very spirit soaring.  Very.  Of course, ended the day in the hot tub, with an Octoberfest Sammie.  A good day.

 Pulse --> enjoying the gifts

Spirit Soaring - Lucy style

We were outside for hours - oh it is wonderful to be outside.  Several months back, before 1014, I heard a bird calling when I was walking into the office and I realized I hadn't heard a bird in a long time. What the heck. I actually stopped and was filled with such dread for the office day ahead.  Dread - what a gloomy, hopeless, painful word.   It was another sign from the universe that "1014" was right.  Now, I hear birds every day and I feel the sun and I smell the air for more than the time it takes to walk from car to door... this is much better for me, much better.
Lucy and I explored "the "S" - a Sunday River swimming hole just down the street.  We walked along the rocks and checked out a few caves.  Lucy took a dip. I slipped on some leaves and fell down a steep hill.  Faithful companion bounded along and stood over me licking and drooling to make sure I was ok.  What if I wasn't?  What would I do?  Again, resourcefulness, figuringitoutness, being more careful all come to mind.  More things to work on. While my trusty companion was right there, she was not going to save me.  I did not have my phone.  It was a good learning moment.  Now - I will not leave my house without my phone, I'll wear better hiking shoes, I'll watch where I step.  And I'll try to teach the pooch how to dial :)

Pulse --> learning

Week 4

Another beautiful day in paradise - the mountain air is perfumed with cherry wood smoke and warm pine needles.  The sun is shining and the hawks are circling and I think I even heard some turkeys thumping in the back woods. I can see Sunday River twinkling through the trees and hear it rushing over the rocks.  It's all so soothing and peaceful. I am alone with my new companion - Lucy the wonder dog.  She is the sweetest dog I ever met.  She seems determined to make me feel good with her chocolate eyes and warm body and quiet presence where ever I go... I feel safe.  I was starting to freak myself out being here ALL ALONE.  I was imagining all kinds of deadly deeds and didn't get much sleep.  I have a new found appreciation for people that live alone.  I think maybe strong, brave, resourceful, daring, are charateristics needed to make it work.  I want to develop those and overcome this fraidy cat phase.  I go back and forth between feeling sorry for myself ( and being amazed that I am still feeling that way)  and starting to feel that there just might be another way.  I am learning a lot about myself - eyes wide open so I can see the things that are not all that pretty but then I can do something about it... woods wisdom :).  Lucy is also a great conversationalist - she listens and grunts her opinons then listens some more... isn't that what makes a great conversationalist - excellent listening skills :)?  I think she and I will talk through a lot of 1014transition topics during her visit.  We seem to really get into a good groove when we're out in the woods.  We're going to explore a new trail today.  Her mother left me with her hunter's vest - bright orange dontshootmeIamnotadeer kind of thing.  Very practical.   She is grunting and drooling - time to head out.

Pulse --> thinking

Mountain air

Spending a few weeks in the Maine mountains - Sunday River and the Mahoosic Mt range.  Spectacular.  The air is crisp, the trees are in late fall bloom, the mountains are in purple majesty.  I am having trouble loading pictures to the computer so will have to just store them up until I am back to the Cape.  I'm here with big T for his 6 day offstretch.  We've cleaned the shed and the garage and started the snow blower and moved the snow mobiles and stacked wood and killed cluster flies ( little bastards).  We sat in the hot tub under millions of stars staring up at the milky way watching for shooters and waving at the satellites. And we sat in the tub during the snowstorm listening to the flakes melt.  It's so quiet here.  I can actually sleep for many hours straight.  And I've been cooking up a storm.  I forgot how much I like to cook.  And I am working on my next sewing assignment... busy and happy.  T is heading back to work for 4 days so I asked number 1 girl to come for a visit and bring up the beast to keep me company for awhile ... Lucy - the sweetest, kindest, most super licking pit bull on earth.  We're going to try to hang out for a few weeks and see how we do. 
Gram is a "GO" for Tuscany so we are in full swing with the reservations! YEH!  And T and I are going to see number 1 son for his graduation from another very hard school in Dec.  After graduation, we're going to do a road trip to Zion and Bryce National Parks with him!  YAHOO!  Xmas gifts to each other.  Oh my spirit is soaring just thinking about it!!!!
The welome home - bon voyage - happy birthday -  bash at big "P's" is on in a few weeks.  Will be so great to see everyone again.
Pulse - searching