Finding Cape Jewels

REALLY liking this zumba dancing!  Was on such a natural high :) after the Sat class so went for a 5 mile walk to CC beach - over 10K steps!  It was sunny and cold and beautiful.  And there were SO MANY surfers and kite surfers in the water!  Crazy cats!  It was a great day.

Kite surfer, Coast Guard beach

Met a few new people last week who shared a few new places.  Went with some "meetup" folks on a hike last Sunday - White Cedar trail at Marconi Beach.  It was a beautiful, windy walk through some marsh land and forest.  Have added this to the list of places to take visitors.

White Cedar Trail, Marconi beach

Met up with the East Dennis Oyster farmer on Mon morning to start research for the PT article.  Had to be at his house by 9am so we could hit the low tide.  He and his wife farm 2 acres and want me to understand their whole operation.  Showed me the equipment sheds, coolers, cages, stakes, nets... then we went to Dennisport harbor to pull in some nets full of oysters that needed to be put into cages in the ocean... and then we drove out to his farm.  OMG incredibly beautiful and fascinating.  It's right near Paines Creek - and boy do I love Paines Creek!   He had to put the harbor oysters into the cages and harvest 500 oysters to be mailed to Dallas and NY.  They harvest a few hundred every Thurs to be used at the raw bar they run at Chapins restaurant every weekend.  He puts back the ones that are not sold so they can continue to grow.  The tide was lllllooooooowwwww...famous flats low.  We drove right onto the beach.  The wind was howling, the air was biting, the surf was in the distance looking like it might come rolling in any minute.  He pulled up nets and opened cages and filled baskets - I took pictures, asked him a million questions and soaked it all in.  He gave me some clamming boots to wear and a very thick sweatshirt to put over my jacket - "keep warm and dry and this is a blast" he said.   Geez it was great.  Then they took me to lunch at the Brazilian barbecue place in Hyannis - a meat lovers paradise.  They were doing casasha shots from coconuts, I passed.  Did that in Sao Paulo and woke up 2 days later.  Wanted to keep my wits about me - you never know... if they were planning to kill me later, I wanted to be ready :)  I'll see them again in March for the first "planting" of the 2012 crop. They are insisting that their oysters are the freshest, yummiest fish on the Cape and that I must try one.  I will (!) Can't wait!

Crows Pasture, oyster farm, East Dennis

Oyster farmer John, checking his crop, East Dennis

Harvesting for Dallas

http://www.facebook.com/pages/East-Dennis-Oyster-Farm/170688036288?ref=ts

Farmer Tim got back to me too, YES on the article, NO on working there but my name is on a list in case they need help once things get going.  Fair enough.  Next have to set up the interview with him.
Don't have any big plans or big expectations - have learned to set the bar low and disappointments are easier to handle :)  Want to learn to fish (so many ponds and tides), kayak in the ponds (and maybe even the ocean!), bike ride the ccrt, write a little, snap great photos, explore off the beaten path, take dance classes, sew pretty quilts, breathe deep, make friends, find peace.

Pulse - finally letting go

Rail is Up

Fixit guy got the handrail up last night.  Yeh!  Looks nice.  Now I'll have something to grab onto next time I find myself hurdling down the stairs.  Bruises still look bad but not so swollen.

Right arm, sore but functional.

Ribs, same on other side.  Very sore.

Have been to two zumba classes now, love it!  Lots of dancing and shaking and moving-moving-moving.  Find myself breathless, soaked and so very happy at the end.  Interesting thing - no one has asked me about the bruises!  They are very (very) easy to see but no one has asked a thing.  I do believe they think I have been battered.  Thought for sure someone would come up to me and say - what the heck happened to your arms and back - but nope.  Not one of the 50 or so women in these classes has said a word.  Find that very interesting.. what does that mean?  Is it being respectful?  Is it being uninterested?  What if it were true?  Doesn't anyone want to help?  And if asked, I would have said that I fell down the stairs which sounds just like a victim's reply!  What would I do if I saw someone's bruises at a dance class?   Hmm.  After this experience, if I should ever see something like this on another, I will ask about it and leave it to her to decide next steps.  At least, I will offer a lifeline.  This is a good example of a program I heard on npr a while back about getting involved.  The point of the program was that too many people turn the other way when they see things that make them uncomfortable for fear of be intrusive, nosey and simply from apathy - plain ol' not giving a damn.  And the lesson in the program was to do the opposite - to ENGAGE, GET INVOLVED, reach out to another and let them know they are not alone.  I will.  I will.

Had drinks with those neighbors the other night.  He is 88 and she is 84.   They look good, mentally sharp, he is physically fit, she is a bit wobbly, both had two drinks, shared their life stories and asked about me in a very polite way.  They had tapas laid out, fireplace glowing, warm and inviting. Very nice evening.  I brought flowers.

Joined a camera club (!) so I can learn to take really good photos.  Id also like to get a good camera so need some guidance there.  The club goes out on hikes at all times of the day, night, weather, locations etc to take "the best photos ever".  Sounds awesome.   Plan to attend the Feb meeting and get going!  Want to do Paines Creek justice.

Paines Creek, winter sunset

 Rainy, foggy day today.  Love it.  Working on my winter ocean quilt, almost done frosting the grannies, finishing hanging curtains, listening to npr.  A good day.

Pulse - one day at a time

SOB!

Heard back from my Editor at PT - she likes the idea of the oyster farming story and gave the go to get started.  Spoke with the Oyster farmers and they are thrilled to do it!  They suggested I work with them through the Spring and follow some oysters from farm to plate.  SOB!  PT Editor has not read my "Grapevine" story yet but said not to worry as if she has any issues with it, "together we will make it work".  SOB!

Persistence- always a good vice :)

Pulse - "better to try and fail than fail to try".  SOB!

Snowy weekend

Gray weekend, snow, wind - awesome.  I love stormy days.  Took out all my fabric to get a good look at the stash - holy moly.  I shouldn't buy anything more for a LONG time.  Plan to bring some to the Project Linus workshop on Feb 11 along with a little granny baby blanket from the "someday" stash.  Signed up to "tie", "piece" and iron.  Should be a fun day.

Years of leftovers from me, Mem and Alice

Started working on the nine patch squares and frosting my colorful, scarp grannies.  Watched it snow and blow all day Sat.  Beautiful morning on Sunday.  Went to dig out the new baby and found 3 cars next to me still full of snow too.  They belong to the 3 neighbors on my left - all at least 80 y/o women.  So, of course, I shoveled them out too.  Kinds matters :)

Colony Drive, after the snow

Met up with some of the women from "social over 40" group Sun afternoon for lunch and the Pats.  Went to "Chapins" in Dennis.  Open year round.  Excellent place, near "Gina's By the Sea".  Fun to watch the game with a rowdy crowd.  I wasn't going to go.  Was just going to stay in and watch by myself but kept thinking, if I am going to build a new life, I have to get on to the hard business of building so must get out and engage and give and try.  So I went and had fun. I met some oyster farmers from East Dennis.  They were at the raw bar shucking oysters for .99 per.  I couldn't bring myself to try - on the house or not.  I'd love to do a story about them for PrimeTime  but still have not heard back from the Editor.  I left another vmsg and email.  I won't get ruled out because of lack of interest or persistence on my part... border line - persistence and pest :)

One of the new friends asked each of us - real fast - what 6 things can you not live without?  I said:

1. Hope (that things will get better)
2. Faith (that this is not all there is)
3. My children (reason to live)
4. Health (for a good life)
5. Determination (to make it)
6. Self Confidence (because leaning is not reliable)

Will be interesting to answer this again same time next year.  

Went to check out one of my favorite spots - Paines Creek - to see what it looks like after the snow.  Still beautiful.  Sat there for awhile and listened to the Adele cd, then went to the bar to watch the Pats with new friends artist, bank examiner, and the teacher.

Paines Creek, after the snow

Fell down the damn stairs again last night.  Landed on my back and bruised some ribs.  Looks like I was in a terrible fight.  Hurts.  Had socks on and just slipped all the way down.  Cried myself to sleep.  I was so sad and sore and alone.  Woke up thinking I am still a long way from tough but working on it.  This week - line dancing, zumba class, wine tasting event, quilting, job search, long walks.

Pulse - "to everything there is a season"

A Good Day

Snowed last night.  Cold out now.  Everything is white and crunchy, pretty.  The curtains and rods arrived today.  Curtains look nice.  Will get them up early next week.  Checked out the Cape Code Organic Farm - so cool.   It seemed pretty deserted when I pulled in but decided to poke around and check out the enormous pig anyway.  Then a truck pulled up and out stepped Farmer Tim!  The Universe spoke and said I was where I was supposed to be... I shook his hand and told him how awesome I thought his farm was, that I had a check for my csa share and wanted to sign up to work off some of the fee, and that I would love to work with them this upcoming season - hiring?  We had a very nice talk ( seems learning to schmooze in corporate life may pay off now and then) and he said that likely they would be hiring and he would be in touch.  Fingers crossed.  The csa share runs for 18 weeks - May - Oct and includes all the herbs and flowers you can pick(!).  Oh boy am I happy about this.

http://www.capecodorganicfarm.org/

The Boar 

CC Organic Farm land in January

 Another storm is due tomorrow so wondered what the surf looked like.  Took the shiny new car to check it out.  Choppy, blue, windy, cold.

Corporation Beach - Dennis

Checked out a local bog - what happens to those little bushes when it's 10 degrees outside?  Well, they look as beautiful as ever.

Bill's Bog - Brewster

Talked with one of the queen bees from the Quilting club to get clear directions on projects in progress.  Supposed to make nine patch blocks for the Feb meeting to be used in Wounded Warrior quilts - given to vets - and Project Linus quilts - given to new babies.  So nice.  Plan to work on them during the storm tomorrow.  Love stormy days.  Joining the "Over 40"(funny) Meetup to listen to another jazz group tomorrow night - right down the street so can even walk home if storm is too crazy.

Saw a PM position on craig's list this morning.  Looks like it might be with HP somewhere on the Cape.  Sent in a cover letter and resume - see what happens.  Never hurts to keep practicing conversations.  This is the 16th position I've replied to from craig's list and have not heard back from any of them.  But have learned, cannot catch a fish without a line in the water :)

Listened to a great interview on NPR's Science Friday about "mindfulness".  Discussed techniques for quieting rambling thoughts, went through a little practice exercise on air.  Pulled over and faced the bog so I could join them.  Very nice.
 
 Pulse - feels good to feel good again

List Checking

Now that I finally feel better, everything I need to do is racing through my mind.  Wrote it all down, prioritized, put many on the "some day" side and set end of Feb to get everything else just DONE.  It's cold and I need curtains and rods to keep out the DRAFT - ordered and due to arrive this week, lined up someone to help me install (check).  Downstairs is COLD and keeps the whole condo COLD.  I thought maybe I'd wait on a gas stove but it's COLD - shopped around, ordered and due to be installed next week (check).  My Xterra was making SO MANY noises that I was afraid - enrolled in AAA and picked up the new car today (check).  Found myself talking to myself, getting bogged down - joined meetups, quilt club, wine club and attending all meetings (check).

Honda CRV, sliver with gray leather

Remote start, roof rack

A few BIG things left - CSA share, health insurance, bike tune up and rack, kayak rack, maybe a little job...

 Pulse - staying positive

Week 14

Hard to believe 14 weeks of freedom already.  Wowza.  Winter has been very mild, except for yesterday. Yesterday it was 15 outside and 18 inside.  The wind was howling and my bedroom curtains were blowing all over the place.  Not good.  I was SO cold.  Even my face was cold.  Seems this little condo is drafty.  Got online to overstock.com and ordered curtains and rods for every window and door.  Very good deal there.  Should arrive in 5-10 days.  I've been thinking about it and telling myself I really should get some and now it's done.  Just the putting up left.  Will cross that hurdle when they arrive.

Nice visit with Alice last weekend to restup and catchup.  Didn't end up going to the Meetup Choir concert.  It was snowing and blowing so we decided to just stay in and chill.  Played Words with Friends online (lost to almost everyone but we're learning these new age words and rules so one day soon we will be good), made squares, worked on the puzzle, slept late, didn't get dressed, watched football, ate yummy food.  Bruises are turning a nice yellow now and not so sore.  Cold is pretty much gone. Was a good weekend.

Using up leftover colors to make a pretty afgan

New England Shells to frame once done

Got a call this morning that my new car is in.  Ready to pick up on Thurs.  YEH!  The Xterra is still running so all is well so far.  Plan to check out a Line Dancing class tonight, Wine Club tomorrow night.  "108" neighbors knocked on my door yesterday.  Nice couple.  Have lived at The Colony for 10 years.  Invited me over for a drink.  I did not handle that very well.  Was caught offguard.  Needed a shower, messy hair, do I bring something?... so I said would love to as soon as I am settled in.  Geez.  Not very friendly.  Will continue to work hard on that.  Nothing back from PrimeTime yet - 3 emails and 1 vmsg and no word.  Should at least acknowledge receipt...geeez.

Thinking about Foster care... maybe I would like to be a foster parent.  I think I would like to help out kids like that.  I still have the energy.  I have the time.  I have the place.  I have the need to have a purpose.  I think I might really like to do that.  Maybe this is my next chapter?  Looking into it.  Reading up.  Thinking.

Pulse --> a little lost

Bittersweet

3 years now.  Enough said.

Continue On...

So have given this a lot of thought... on one hand, would prefer human contact to catch up on what's what... one the other hand, I think I really would like to keep track of what happens this first "1014" year. Who knows, may help another to understand how some endings end and beginnings begin.
To catch up:
I no longer have health insurance so must stay healthy, no accidents, until this is figured out.  Of course, have been sick since Jan 2.  and Wed, I fell down my stairs.  I bounced on my hip, my butt, my shoulder, my arm and my hand... all bruised but nothing broken.  I was wearing nice comfy socks to make myself feel better and BAM!  Wind knocked out of me, got right up and almost passed out.  Walked around.  Cried.  Took a shower and some Advil.  Will survive.  Have been living on Mucinex during the day and Nyquil at night.  I LOVE Nyquil. I have been sleeping so soundly, for 8-10 hours every night.  No weird dreams, no waking up a million times... just restful sleeeeepppppp!  This may actually be healing my body and my mind.  Feeling about 75 percent now.

Attended the CC Quilters Guild - oh it was fun.  Saw so many treasures and met so many incredible quilters.  

Cape Cod Quilters Guild, show and tell treasure

Did the PrimeTime interview with the founders of "The Grapevine Wine Club".  Was SO NERVOUS to do that but loaded up on cough drops and went to their house.  Had my trusty reporter's tape recorder (ha!) and my notebook and had a blast.  Spent all last weekend pulling the article together.  Editor wanted 3-5K words.  As always, faced the dreaded "blankwhitepaper" panic but pushed through and got it done.  Sent it in on Tues with 3900.  Emailed and left a vmsg.  Have not heard anything back.  Fingers crossed.  Feel good that I did it.  Standing by.

Paines Creek is still beautiful.  Looks like a postcard everytime I visit.  Hard to believe but you can really walk around here and breathe and stretch and feel so good.

Paines Creek, late afternoon

 Looked through Craig's list for CC jobs... applied for personal slave ( helper for $10/hr but #1 girl will not allow it, wise advice...), Office Admin, and Tutor.  Nothing back yet.  Not eager to find anything but want to keep looking in case something really interesting floats by.

Joined a few "Meetups", a "social seekers over 40", a "kayak and hike" and a "so you want to dance" one.   Met them at the "seekers" at the "Harvest Gallery Wine Bar" in Dennis for drinks and jazz.  Fun and interesting - met 6 women - a teacher, a nurse, a bank examiner, a mosaic artist and 2 Sues that were cruising for men.  The place was really local and artsy and a great night out.

Harvest Gallery Wine Bar,  jamming Jazz Trio

Met some of them again the next day for a hike around Big Cliff Pond at Nickerson State Park.  They brought their dogs - a big, smelly, chocolate lab (Wiley) and a cutie pie, oogly eye pug (Ladybug).  It was BEAUTIFUL - almost 4 miles around the pond through forests and across sandy beaches and by peaceful overlooks... it was amazing and almost 7500 steps (guidelines per Alice suggest a healthy 10K steps a day).  Went back a few times already.  This one is on my list of favorites.  We went to lunch afterwards then to a photographer's opening at the Library.  One of the women knew the photographer. It was a fine day.

Big Cliff Pond, view from circuit trail

Another day, headed back out to National Seashore Salt Pond Visitors Center to get some fresh air.  Felt lousy but needed some air.    Alice and I spotted a trail to Coast Guard beach when we were here a few weeks ago and I wanted to check it out.  Well, it was awesome.  What isn't awesome on Cape Cod???!  About 9500 steps round trip.  Along a bike path, through stands of pines loaded with all kinds of birds, across cool bridges and ending up a Coast Guard beach - 2011 ranked as one of the most beautiful beaches in the world.  Came across some signs that talked about an artist who wrote a book in 1928 about living in a house on this beach - "The Outermost House, A Year of Life on the Great Beach of Cape Cod".  This is the eastern most point.  It's hard to describe beautiful.  Got the book.  Stand by.

Salt Pond Bike Trail, not another soul in sight

Coast Guard beach, site of "The Outermost House"

Have started playing "Words with Friends" online.  Jane is the master.  Very brilliant.  She is playing me, Alice and brother Traveler all at the same time.  We believe she is playing several others too.  She beats us all.  But, we are learning, filing everything away, learning learning learning....  It's a lot of fun.

Hanging around the Cape waiting for my new car to come in.  Decided on the Honda CRV, 4WD, sliver, leather, remote start (treat to my old self).  Expect it in next week.  Gently driving Xterra until then - too many pings and humms and whistles to go very far.

Call into number one son - believe he is back from Cuba.  Eager to hear how it went.  Lots of nice conversations with the Lovely one.  Such a hard worker, determined, creative, tireless, smart, wise... I do believe the universe is keeping an eye on that one.  Her ship is coming.

Alice is visiting this weekend.  Yeh!  We'll watch the Pats on Sat and join a Meetup gathering in Wellfleet on Sunday - Gospel Chorus Recital at Perservation Hall then dinner (!)

Have a colorful granny square afgan in  the works for when I sit in front of the tube,  a "Shells of New England" jigsaw puzzle to work on during NPR story hours, a winter seascape quilt on my mind, new friendships to nurture, long time friendships to stay connected, internet fun and games to keep up with and determination that a heavy heart is not too much of a burden.

Pulse - one day at a time

Car Shopping!

Time for a new car.  Have been hearing lots of pings and rattles and squeaks that can no longer be blocked out with the radio.  The Xterra has been a great car, cool look, awesome radio, decent mileage... but time for a change.   Been using "edmunds.com" to research and compare.  Great site.  Test drove a Subaru Forrester, Honda CRV, Chvy Equinox, Hyundai Tucson and Hyundai Santa Fe.  Looked at the KIA Sportage and the Nissan Rogue too ( Alice has one and loves it).  Have narrowed it down to the CRV and the Equinox.  Leaning toward the Honda.  Now it's time to negotiate ( I hate this part).  Goal is to complete the txn by eom..... phone is ringing as I write :)  

Have been invited to the Cape Cod Quilter's Club tonight.  Dream come true!  Also joined a Meetup in the area and will be making new friends Fri night.  And interview for PrimeTime tomorrow - nervous and excited to pull it together and submit for review.  Fingers crossed.

Pulse - new beginnings - yahoo!

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Happy New Year

2012 - holy moly!  Enjoyed NY Eve with PB and DebandTom.  Still feels little crappy saying "debandtom" to someone else but it does get better every day :) Beautiful new home.   Gave them a famous gram blanket and two little Anna Lee mice.  Great people.

DebandTom - welcome to 2012 and a whole new beginning!

Happy New Year 2012!

 No insurance now so focused on staying helathy til i figure it out.  And, of course, woke up sick as a dog.  Have the fur ball in my chest thing going on.  Coughing, blinding headache, sore throat.  Feel like crap.  Of course.  Last year, would have felt sorry for myself.  This new year, got dressed, loaded up on pocket tissues and went chicken soup-diet ginger ale-cough drops shopping.  Then came home and made it and feel better already.  Checked out Craig's list for jobs on the Cape.  I saw a few that looked interesting from a personal assistant (!?) to a CEO's Exec Admin to a CPA firm's receptionist... Sent a few notes and resumes.  Standing by (!)  I have it in my head that I need insurance right away.  I've been reading up and there are lots of different ways.  Hopefully my cold will not be the end of me and when better, will figure this out.   Am also looking at new cars.  It's time.  So far, I like the Tucson, Pilot, and Rogue.  I also joined a few "Meetups" to really start to connect on  the Cape.  Going to first CC Quilting club meeting this week and doing my first interview.  Am determined to make 2012 the turnaround year :)  

Pulse --> hopeful